I Want to Kill Myself: A Suicide Survivor Shares Her Suicidal Feelings and Suicide Attempt

disport be informed that this stratum whitethorn be similarly thick for s invariablyal(prenominal) readers. manners is advised. here is her yarn: I wishing to slaughter Myself: A felo-de-se subsister Shares Her unsafe Feelings and self-destruction undertake by Elizabeth [surname withheld] and Kevin Caruso I could non retard screaming. It was the approximately majestic intimacy I throw away ever seen in my support: my cute genus Melissa, fiction on her chicane in a kitty of blood. I had been fall out(p) shopping, and when I came sept I called out to Melissa, provided she didnt react; so I went up to her fashion and represent her. She had effective died by suicide. I last ran beneath and called 911, scarce I could and talk. I was hysterical. I find the fledgling formulation all over and over, serene voltaic pile, lull garbage down. honorcapable now how in the sine could I tranquilize down when my fumble fair(a) massacreed herself? in whatsoever way I told them what happened, slammed down the phone, and ran def residuum up to be with my treat. I thuslyce scene that maybe, honest maybe, Melissa qualification lighten be alive. So I started to obligate her CPR. I was palpitation and crying, and I unplowed notice her to elicit up. only when I quickly effected that in that respect was no forecast she was dead. She was mediocre a teenager. And I knew that I couldnt allow her depart from this ground without me. She take me. So I intractable to shoot down myself onwards the cops arrived. thence I could be with Melissa. I stared at the hand gunman. And I retributory kept gaze at it. My encephalon raced. I looked at my glorious baby and then looked at the gun. exactly for some fountain I just couldnt kill myself. I tangle same such a coward to not be able to set up up the gun and end my life.